How Do You Know What I "Can" or "Cannot" do? Mind Your Business

I’m just about to turn the corner and onto another path. I’ve been walking towards this juncture for the past 3 + years. I originally didn’t know what this other path looks like other than I knew it existed and that I would get here sooner or later. I didn’t even know how long it would take – nor did I care. The best I could do was guesstimate and (dream) what it might look like.

The road here wasn’t an easy one. I had my challenges just like anyone else would have. I did hit a few roadblocks but I never gave up. I was realistic about my journey from the start. I knew I would face many challenging decisions that would result in gross errors. Oppppsss! My Bad. I took responsibility, apologized and learned from the experience.

Okay, here's the truth - I did feel like quitting - on a few occasions. Those were the days when I believed that I couldn’t do it anymore. "What’s the point… I’m done – working 9 – 5 is the way to make a living and it’s easier!"

"Who am I kidding” I’d say to myself, “I’d be miserable within a day.”

I never said no, not even on those days when I felt like giving up. I accepted every challenge with or without experience. In hindsight, most of the skills I posses today were developed by taking on challenges with no prior experience. I just do things and learn along the way. Sometimes I make a few mistakes and sometimes HUGE errors. Oh Well! Live and learn is what I say.

Even when people tell me that I have no business doing what I am doing –it goes in one ear and out the other. If I listened to people tell me what I can and cannot do, I wouldn’t be a life coach today nor would I be benefiting from the results that come from being in position #1 on Google. My question for those people is: How do you know what I can or cannot do? Thanks, but I rather learn if I “can” or “cannot” on my own.

It wasn’t until I heard a friend whose working towards becoming a voice actor say, “The first 3 years in the industry is a weaning period, those who are committed survive and those who aren’t won’t. Its how the industry knows whose who." And so I asked myself, “What do I need to do to make it through the “weaning” period?” My answer to ‘me’ “Keep doing what you’re doing.” So I soldiered on.

I got here because I never quit - I believe in me and I don’t let others decide what I “can” or “cannot” do. I accept that I will never be a mathematician, or scientist and although my writing skills have improved I still have a long way to go but it will never be perfect and that’s okay because nor am I.

Tomorrow I turn the corner. :)

Bruno LoGreco Life Coach & Mentor

How Do You Know What I "Can" or "Cannot" do? Mind Your Business

TOP SECRET - The Secrets To Confidence Building. You Won't Want To Miss This

Secret – Secret – I Got A Secret! Do you REALLY want to know the secret to boosting self-confidence? It could change your life forever. You know by the time you finish reading this post you will have learnt the secret. My question to you is how much are you willing to put out there to boost your level of confidence to really be the confident person you wish you were?

I had a secret up until August of 2008. I carried it with me everyday for over three decades. It controlled every move I made - everything from what I did, who I spoke with and where I frequented. Everything I did was calculated according to my secret. I spent a considerable amount of energy protecting it – I was always conscious not to give it away. It was draining.

Did you know that your deepest secret is also your greatest insecurity? Take a moment to think about it. What is your deepest secret and what is it preventing you from doing? What do you believe it is doing to your self-confidence?

My secret stopped me from living the life I dreamed. I was too afraid of being judged, not to mention the consequences I’d have to pay – the ridicule and the jokes, the topic of discussion around the dinner table and who knows what else. The life I dreamed would eventually strip the shield protecting the secret I held, and I wasn’t having any of it.

It wasn’t worth it to me but I punished myself. I forbid myself from following the dream. What I hadn’t realized is with each passing moment my level of confidence was plunging deeper and deeper into a hole. And then it hit me:

If it REALLY isn't worth it to me then why am I punishing myself? Why do I get punished and have to suffer? And.. Why am I punishing myself?

And that is when I had the “Aha” moment – if I tell everyone my secret: i) I will learn the truth about people and who they really are, and ii) I could finally live the dream. All I had to do was tell them my secret and I wouldn’t have to ever worry about it again. I would no longer be a hostage in my own prison.

From that day on I placed greater value on my dream than I do on gossip and peoples insecurities. As result I learned the SECRET to confidence building. How about you, did you learn it?

Bruno LoGreco Life Coach & Mentor

TOP SECRET - The Secrets To Confidence Building. You Won't Want To Miss This

Five simple steps to a new life — or a slightly better one

What if Woody Allen was wrong? This and other thoughts on the value of self-esteem

BY CHANDLER LEVACK January 27

eyeweekly.com

Five simple steps to a new life — or a slightly better one

How Do I Get My Lazy Unmotivated Kid Off The Couch?

Why do parents ask me this question?

Your kid is not the only one sitting around the house doing nothing. A lot of kids lack drive and ambition. Many, to some degree will probably go through a similar phase in there 20’s. It’s the natural progression of development - the transition from adolescent into adulthood, and some kids have a difficult time with it.

I know - nobody wants to see their kid sitting around the house being lazy after quitting a number of jobs or dropping out of school. It’s a tough thing to swallow and it pokes holes into what you believe about your parenting skills. You’ve done an excellent job. Its not your fault it’s just the natural progression of development, so don’t worry. They have enough pressure as it is, they don’t need your insecurities too.

Right now they are developing skills to cope with personal and professional connections, love and parenting skills. It’s a lot to figure out. In the previous phase they developed their identity. If for whatever reason they weren’t able to develop the acceptance of oneself then the phase they are in now poses a great challenge. Its like asking a grade 1 kid to do grade 2 math. If the kid wasn’t taught basic math skills, it is unlikely he will do well .

This is the challenge your kid faces today. So they feel anxious, stressed out, inadequate and not good enough, and some say they feel like complete failures. With this mindset their self-confidence is shot so there is no reason for them to get off the couch.

The key is to identify and foster their natural strength or passion. Everyone has something. Find and develop it - enroll them into programs and support them. And if for whatever reason they fall off the wagon, its okay – no big deal, it just wasn’t the right one. Sooner or later they will find the right one.

With the proper support and encouragement they will not only get off the couch they will be motivated to succeed beyond there 20’s and into the future.

Bruno LoGreco Life Coach & Mentor

How Do I Get My Lazy Unmotivated Kid Off The Couch?

I had to take care of things and act responsible, it was the responsible thing to do

Everything happened so fast. One moment I was a child playing, and in the next I had to play adult. It happened so quick I didn’t even notice. Looking back I didn’t get to do what most kids did. I had to take care of things and act responsible, it was the responsible thing to do.

I forgot what its like to have fun. I was too focused on being responsible. I tried to please too many people to prove that I could and I forgot about me. Yeah, I did forget about me. I left me behind many years ago. But somehow I feel that is still I today.

I listened to those around me. Some were encouraging and some not. I heard some stuff so often I started to believe it, its hard not to. Then one thing led to another, and to another, and here I am. But it just doesn’t seem right. I feel there is so much more – much more to be discovered.

I feel the child in me want to play. It screams, won’t you come out to play? I can’t play I must be responsible and I’m too old to play. Am I - Am I really that old that I cannot play?

We all have an inner child. It is also know as your “higher consciousness” “divine self” and a few other terms. It is the creative, playful part of the soul that is often left behind in a traumatic experience. Anything from abandonment to abuse could create a traumatic experience and leave an unhealed wound within the soul. This can lead the inner child part of us to react to certain situations, and block our creativity.

The process of connecting with your inner child and opening the door for it to explore these feeling and the world can change your life in unbelievable ways. The process is quite simple but for many extremely difficult. It means looking into a mirror and acknowledging your existence.

Below is a short dialogue to begin the process of acknowledging your inner child. Find a quiet place where you won’t be disturbed. You may want to journal the experience.

1. Look into a mirror and make eye contact with yourself.
2. Begin by saying the following:
3. I know I haven’t been there for you, and I am sorry
4. I want to make it up to you
5. I didn’t know you existed but now I know and I want to build a relationship with you
6. With time I can prove to you that I will never leave you again
7. You don’t need to be afraid anymore, I will protect you
8. You are safe to play again.
9. I love you

We are never too old to play. It’s the playful side within us that create the beautiful wonders we see today. Don’t be fooled by age and what you heard throughout the years if you feel it within you then its time to let it out to play.

Bruno LoGreco Life Coach & Mentor

I had to take care of things and act responsible, it was the responsible thing to do

Tag, You're It!

Do you remember that game? It wasn’t one of my favorites to play. I wasn’t a lean young boy I was a bit on the chubby side, thanks to the delicious lasagna my mother made. I’m Italian, and Italian folks feed their children lots of pasta and physical activity isn’t on the menu. The bigger you get the happier Mama is. So playing “Tag” was challenging especially if I was “it” because I spent a lot of time chasing.

What I hated most about playing the game was there were no boundaries. The entire neighborhood was a playground. Everyone out ran me so it made it almost impossible for me to catch anyone. It didn’t make me feel good about myself. I believed that I was the fat kid that couldn’t catch anyone. But I knew that if I just continued to play I would eventually be fast enough to catch someone.

I was only 10 years old and I knew that if I were to catch anyone I would not only have to continue to play I would also need to lose weight and get into shape. When nobody was watching at home I’d do sit-ups and pushups on the living room floor. I also joined the school track and field team. I lost a lot of weight and eventually I did catch someone and I wasn’t always “it” anymore.

I’m glad I was ‘it” and couldn’t catch anyone. That experience taught me many lessons. I learned the importance of health, to go after the things I choose and that it takes time and effort to achieve anything important in life. And as long as you don’t give up you will get what you set off to do.

But the most important lesson I learned from the experience is that in life we have choices; We can choose to do nothing and believe it’s not within our power to change or we can choose to do something and believe we have all the power to change. What do you choose to believe?

Tag, You’re It!

Bruno LoGreco Life Coach & Mentor

Tag, You're It!

A Worthless Life Overwhelmed With Responsibilities. When Is It My Turn?

The day begins early in the morning for many people. For some it starts by getting children up and ready for school. That means awakening them from a deep sleep, getting them dressed, fed, and out the door on time. For others it’s a dash to work but not before spending closer to an hour in traffic. And for many it’s both – dropping children off at school and then making a mad dash to work.

After a long day of listening to colleagues talk in circles and push paper from one bin to another, its another mad dash back to the school to chauffeur the kids to their after school activity. By the time everything is said and done its too late to do anything else other than get home, undress and hopefully relax if dinner doesn’t need to be prepared and the kids don’t need their homework checked.

Is it any wonder so many people feel goals are unachievable. Life is too difficult, as it is, to worry about chasing a dream. There’s just too much happening in one day already. The day is packed with responsibilities - Relationships, family, driving kids to and from activities and school, career, and a social life, and in the midst of it all the day-to-day errands. Its constant go-go-go from the moment they wake to the moment they lay their head down to sleep. It’s exhausting and there isn’t enough time in a day to think of anything else, is there?

Forget about goals and dreams for a moment and think about your ‘self-worth’. After many years of running here and there, doing this and that for everyone and never really doing anything for yourself, how do you feel?

How do you think you will feel after a decade or two of that kind of lifestyle? Yes, you do have responsibilities and commitments especially if you have children, but what about YOU? What about your responsibility to take care of YOU? You will be useless to all those people that depend on you if you fall ill. You need to accept that you are equally important as everyone else before you begin to feel like your worthless, or not good enough, or simply that nobody appreciates what you do for him or her.

Maybe you already feel that you’re not good enough and subconsciously believe those are the things you must do for you to feel like you are ‘good enough’. Perhaps you take advice from your friends, family and colleagues, that doesn’t bode well with your natural intuition and it leaves you feeling incapable of do anything for yourself. If you do feel this way already it is time you start taking care of you. You need to because if you don’t nobody will. And that’s a harsh reality.

It is time to accept that you are equally important as everyone else and to start doing things for YOU. Here is how you get started:

Three Simple Effective Steps To Make It Your Turn

1. Think back to a period in your life when you were not overwhelmed by responsibilities. How old were you? What activities did you enjoy? Did you enjoy things like art, sports, writing, meditating, improv, maybe you enjoyed things like building and fixing stuff? Make a list of those things. Try to remember at least 10 things you enjoyed.

2. After writing the list review and organize it relevant to your interests and pick the top 3.

3. Schedule time for YOU weekly, and participate in those activities.

If you follow these very simple yet effective steps, you will rediscover yourself. You will feel happier and those around you will feel your happiness and will be happy for you. You might even discover that self-happiness has a way of making life less difficult and more enjoyable all while making the realization that it IS your turn.

Bruno LoGreco Life Coach & Mentor, Motivational Speaker and TV Personality

A Worthless Life Overwhelmed With Responsibilities. When Is It My Turn?

Life Mapping - The Road Map You Need

I keep telling everyone, what you think you want and what you really want are two different things. Some of them believe me, and will want to learn and discover what they really want, but some question and tell me, they already have what they really want. And that could be the case, but I ask them: How do you really know what you want?

There is 365 days a year, 24 hours in one day, and 60 minutes in every hour. How many experiences, bad or good, do you think you’ve had in your lifetime? How many triumphs, success, perceived failures, and bad relationships did you experience? How much of those experiences influence your decisions today? And, how much of what you already have today was influenced by those experiences? So I ask again - How do you really know what you want?

The older you get the more difficult it will become to remember each experience and the effects. There will be simply too many to remember. Some of those experiences will be fresh in your mind while others will be a distant memory, although, the effects could be expressed at any moment.

A Life Map could be the secret to learning what you really want. There are different kinds of maps, which could be used, to discover different things about you and your life. There are many purposes to using one. You could use one to write your autobiography, recognize behavioral patterns, or to discover what you really want throughout your lifetime.

Go back in time and map your successes, if you identify a pattern it could pave the path to your next career. Map your perceived failures and you could stumble upon a treasure chest of tools and lessons. Map your failed relationships and you could learn the reason why your relationships aren’t working.

LIFE MAPPING

1. Think back to your childhood and make a list of all your success.
a. Next to each success write the age you were.

2. Think back to when you were a teenager. What challenges did you face?
a. Next to each challenge write the age you were.

3. Reflect back to your perceived failures. What are they?
a. Next to each experience write the age you were.

4. On a blank piece of paper draw a horizontal line at the bottom of the page. At the "left" end of the line enter Age 1. At the "right" end of the line enter your current age. This will be your life line. Now draw 3 lines to create 3 rows, one for each category: Success, Challenge, and Perceived Failure.

5. Map each experience in its respective row. Use the age to plot the experience in the correct spot on your Map.

When you finish mapping your experiences ask yourself the following questions:

1. What did I learn about myself?
2. Do I recognize any patterns?
3. Am I surprised by anything I see on my life map?
4. Am I okay if I continue to attract the same things into my life?
5. What must I do to change any negative pattern?
6. Do I really have what I want?
7. What behavior can I commit to developing this year?

Bruno LoGreco Life Coach, Motivational Speaker, and TV Personality

Life Mapping - The Road Map You Need

Communication - Is It The Key To A Successful Relationship?

Most recently I got asked if I provide couples coaching. Can I coach couples to learn to communicate and to establish a new relationship with each other? My answer was “Yes” but I went on to explain that there is a risk that in the end there might not be a relationship. The process and the method I use in couples coaching is almost the same one I use for personal coaching – I teach clients self-awareness and to live authentically, meaning true to one self. To live a truthful and authentic life means being honest with yourself especially when you recognize that you are in a relationship for all the wrong reasons. That's why I split-up couples for the first few sessions.

The couple is split-up so there is no finger pointing during the session – one pointing a finger to the other not owning any responsibility for what they contributed into the relationship. Its easier to coach individuals into seeing what they can't when there isn't somebody else in the room interrupting you only to say, “see, I told you so”, plus they get the freedom to speak candidly, and I make sure I’m a life coach and not a referee.

The benefits couples get when they split-up is endless. It gives them an opportunity to learn about themselves without any judgment coming from the partner. They will be more receptive and engaged in the process and won’t get defensive when faced with the truth.

You can’t repair nor change what you won’t accept is broken.

When they aren't busy defending themselves it means they are open to admitting they're part of the problem, which is the first step to identifying the root cause. It’s typically a dominant, self-limiting and sometimes destructive behavior developed from past experiences, which they are not aware of. Through a series of exercises they learn to recognize those negative behavioral patterns and the triggers, and use the awareness to take better decisions, breaking the cycle of negative behavior. With self-awareness, accepting responsibility and taking ownership for self is much easier, and as a result they are better able to communicate with their partner.

After a few individual sessions, the couple is ready to attend their first session together. Both of them will have a sense of awareness and will be held accountable for his or her behavior during the session - No finger pointing only accountability. The session is designed to test the couple and their ability to communicate with one another during a stressful exercise. It tests the couple as they observe there own behavior and emotions. At the end of the exercise they tell each other 5 things they learned about themselves.

The process is a huge eye opener. The couple learns about each other’s behavior. Unfortunately, sometimes what they learn is enough to end the relationship, but in many cases its enough for the couple to begin to develop a new relationship built on a solid foundation, and they do so with the ability to communicate.

Bruno LoGreco Life Coach & Mentor

Communication - Is It The Key To A Successful Relationship?

The Cat's Meow?

Did you ever meet a person who thinks they're the cats meow? They look and behave confident and exude sensuality. From a distance it looks like they have there shit together but up close you clearly see they’re nothing more than a train wreck. They are the same people who have high standards when it comes to whom they romance. Their mates must be physically fit – God or Goddess type, so onlookers can goggle. They also believe they should be treated like Gods. And the unfortunate aspect is they’re well into their 40’s and probably 50’s.

Do you know the type? They’re the ones that never grew up. Nope, they still think and behave as if they are 20. Most are single or soon to be single again. They play head games and have high expectation of others. Its never them its always someone else that is the problem. Taking responsibility isn’t something they learned yet and a lack of communication skills, plagues their relationships.

And if their behavior and the lack of ownership and responsibility for self isn’t enough, the way they dress screams “Grow Up!”. I for one am not against dressing sexy and showing off skim but I believe it ought to be done with taste and sophistication. Clothing needs to be age appropriate. For those people it is away to attract like-minded mates, or how else will they find each other. Like attracts like. They spot each other from a mile away – They’re like magnets to each other. Its lust at first sight! A match made in paradise.

They are the ones that never look back at life to see what the problem really is. They only look back to relive each breakup, each self-sabotage experience, and everything anyone has ever done wrong to them. They build a defense around what they believe they need to do to become stronger and tougher so they can minimize future heartaches. They go on to live a jaded and scared life. Unfortunately, some never realize they are the problem and continue to repeat the cycle over and over, attracting the same type of mate and continue to experience the same kind of issue with most of their relationships.

But I am happy to say that some do wake one morning and realize that they have been the problem the entire time. They look in the mirror and accept they aren’t 20 anymore. They take ownership and responsibility for all that hasn’t happened, yet. They realize that showing off a little too much skin isn’t the way to attract a real soul mate. And they learn the art of communication – the ability to express thoughts and emotions and not assume that those around them could read minds.

Do you know someone who believes he or she is The Cat’s Meow?

Bruno LoGreco Life Coach & Mentor

The Cat's Meow?

What Inspired You Recently?

You could find inspiration everywhere. Everything you touch, everything you do and everyone you meet could be a source of inspiration. You could find it in anything that interacts with your senses. Think about a time when you got excited after watching something or listened to a song. There aren’t any limitations to finding it other than the limits you put on yourself.

Did you ever find yourself annoyed with something impractical, something that’s supposed to be functional but really isn’t? Did you think it could be designed better if, only it … What did you do with whatever came after the “if” statement? Did you get excited about the idea? Did you believe at that moment if all things were possible and there were no obstacles you would be able to design and develop something better?

How about that speaker who inspired you at the last seminar you attended? Were you mesmerized by what he or she said? Did they say something thought provoking that changed your perception? Did he or she tell you to do something that excited you so much that you did whatever was asked of you the moment the seminar ended? Do you remember if you got excited?

Did you hear about the guy that integrated the digital world to the physical world? That’s right, a guy found away to integrate the digital world into the physical world rending anything including a piece of paper compatible. He found his inspiration in an old style mouse. The one’s with the rubber ball inside it to control the movement of the cursor on your computer screen. Here, check it out for yourself.



Inspiration is everywhere. You just need an open mind, free from clutter and noise to see what is rather than judging what isn’t.

What inspired you recently?

Bruno LoGreco Life Coach, Motivational Speaker & TV Personality

What Inspired You Recently?

Excitement! The Source of Inspiration That Will Inspire You

I am so excited about 2010. 2009 was an amazing year filled with accomplishments, successes, and many invaluable lessons. What I'm taking into 2010 from 2009 is excitement - I know when I get excited about something I make it happen, regardless of how big it is. To me, Its exciting to watch something materialize right before my eyes. It boosts my confidence and my ego too. It makes me want more.

Did I mention that I am excited to be a Motivational Speaker? I started the New Year with representation. The National Speakers Bureau represents me now, and they will book most of my upcoming speaking engagements. But the real reason I am excited is because I get to design these events to be as exciting as I can imagine it to be. Talk about “creative expression.”

Thankfully I took time off this past December, because I caught myself many times throughout the month imagining bits and pieces to the upcoming event I’m designing, it’s titled: “Fear and Success – Judgment Time”. The time off allowed me to submerge into my imagination to design the various aspects of the talk: How I will introduce the topic, the jokes I will tell, the experiences I will share and how I plan to illustrate the illusion many face when dealing with fear. I get to create this entire experience and share it with thousands and hopefully tens of thousands of people.

I will give credit where it’s owed. I’m inspired by what I saw in New York. If I am going to be successful as a Motivational Speaker I must be prepared to give it my all. Everything I have in me to deliver a highly effective and successful talk that will inspire and change the audience’s perception just as mine changed after being inspired by New York.

This is why I am excited about 2010. The entire year is a blank canvas for me to design a work of art. Everything I design will add texture and color to my canvas. I can’t wait to see what it looks like at the end of the year.

Trust you too are excited to create a work of art.

Bruno LoGreco Life Coach, Mentor, Motivational Speaker & TV Personality

Excitement! The Source of Inspiration That Will Inspire You