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    Thursday, April 17, 2008

    Terrorized by Fear

    Can you stop your ego from going off the deep end, even when you are at a state of awareness?

    I was up bright and early this morning, no different than most mornings. I roll out of bed, put myself together, I make my morning espresso, writes some thoughts into iijournal, and then get ready to head to the gym. I walk to the door, put my shoes on, grab my keys, wallet, and head towards the front door. But this morning when I went for my wallet, it wasn’t there. NO WAY! That’s impossible, I shouted. There is no way I lost my wallet. My mind took off tracing back every step I took after getting off the GO-Bus yesterday afternoon in Richmond Hill. The only possible place I could have left my wallet is in the car. I grabbed my car keys and made a mad dash to the front door and to my car. I quickly unlocked the car doors and jumped in to check the console, no wallet. I looked under both front seats, and the back seats. No wallet.

    Oh I hear all the thing I could be doing right now; I could slam the console, that will make me feel better, I could smash the stick shift and hope it breaks, that will make me feel better sooo good--oh I better not, that’s expensive. Ok slam the front door—No, I don’t want to do that either. (Caught you, I could hear you by the way--I’m aware of what a good sensation the ego would feel for reacting to my misfortune this morning. I’m just going to sit hear and listen). Keep in mind I was anxious two days ago about giving my speech at the Peace Festival. I run back to my apartment and look under the couch, under my bed, in the jacket pocket, in my pant pocket, from the pants I wore yesterday at the festival. I even checked the hamper. No wallet. Watch this—I start throwing things around, no way, not again (I don’t want to get hurt so please don’t punch the wall), I just threw my last wallet in the garbage less than two years ago.

    I tell myself to calm down, took me a while to intervene but I wanted to see how far I would let myself go. It’s really funny watching yourself react. When I finally did listen to the Self, I calmed down because I was aware that I was watching myself, and my emotions, as I was reacting. Then I took a few minutes to breath and to become present, in the moment so I could stop tracing back my steps, which recalls the images of my past experiences. Now the reality of my last 30 minutes are blinded by my emotions and anger, so I knew that everything I had just gone through and traced back, were just illusions of what I really saw. I saw what I wanted to see, not what I should have seen.

    I took a few more minutes to get my mind completely off tracing my steps and began moving forward. I sat down and remembered that Visa had sent me a replacement card last week, and that I had not activated it yet. I looked in my file and bingo, there was a new Visa card that required activation and as soon as I activate the new card, the old card would automatically become VOID. I only have one credit card. Done! I then called Visa just to be sure the old card was cancelled. The old card indeed was canceled. So the only real down fall to me losing my wallet this morning is the wallet itself. Oh well, each come easy go, I’ll buy a new one. Out with the old, in with the new is my mantra anyway. That put a smile on my face. At that point I decided to go back to my bedroom and look in the jacket pocket one more time. I put my hands into the front pockets, and nothing. I put my hands into the side pockets, and nothing. Then I took a closer look at the jacket I had just checked twice. Me, told me to look carefully, become present and aware. Long and behold the reason why I didn’t find my wallet in the jacket is because I was checking the wrong jacket. It wasn’t until I was aware and in the moment that I really saw what was there in front of me and not the images I wanted to see which are all the images I put there in the last thirty-minutes. A few jackets to the right, is were the jacket I was wearing yesterday is hanging. I put my hand into the inside pocket and presto, out come the wallet.


    Even when I thought I was aware, the ego took me again without my knowledge and started playing back what I wanted to see. What I wanted to see is no wallet so that the ego can go off the deep end again and feel good and get stronger again. I became aware of my space and when I did, everything in the closet went into slow motion, allowing me to see every inch of detail in that closet, and that is when I saw the jacket I was looking in was not the jacket I was wearing.

    Yesterday at the Peace by PEACE festival, my ego took another significant blow. I took a digital recorder with me to record my speech, in order for me to play it back and learn from it. Early in the day, I put the recorder in my jacket pocket because my pant pockets were full. Just before the speeches began, I reminded myself about the recorder and to go get it. That’s when I began to say to myself, “Ah, you don’t need it, who cares, you don’t want to know how you sound anyway. If you suck then you won’t have anything to remind you. Leave it alone.” I struggled with the idea of the recorder for about five minutes. I finally came to my senses and walked over to my jacket and grabbed the recorder. I pressed the record button as my name was being announced. “And here to speak, Bruno LoGreco.” I walked up to the podium and I could hear my heart, it was beating a mile a minute. Sweat pored down my forehead as the MC handed me the microphone. I quickly started. “ I have a secret… Do you guys want me to share me secret with you?” The room erupted with a yes, I continued, “I’m scared, I’m really afraid of being here right now, but I know that If I’m open and honest with you about how I’m feeling inside, It will go away. See, I’m starting to feel better already.” I don’t know if they thought I was kidding or not, but I wasn’t. (Our little secret) I had no notes, no cheat sheet, nothing, it was do or die for me. Within a minute of being on stage I quickly relaxed and engaged the audience and asked them questions, had some of the kids answering into the microphone. I was not thrown off. Except some how I mixed up the order of two areas I wanted to talk about. But I recovered and I didn’t even flinch when I did realize I mixed the order of the speech up. I did deliver the speech and every component of it.

    The feedback thus far has been great – I did listen to the recorder and it sounds ok to me. I didn’t use hum and and and, but I did have one too many “Right.” I learned something about myself yesterday. I could speak in front of large crowds and I shouldn’t be afraid of speaking. I believed I could not present, I’ve never presented in my life, so how could I be afraid? Yesterday gave me enough confidence in myself to contact Breakfast Television to be a guest on the show.

    Like I said, my ego took another blow yesterday and as a result, it now has one less fear it can terrorize me with.

    Life Choices – Yours To Make
    Bruno LoGreco
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    4 comments:

    fizzycat said...

    Very good.

    Bruno LoGreco said...

    Thank you!

    Liara Covert said...

    Sounds like you were able to really experience how fear can control you if you permit that. At the same time, you realize you can think and behave differently. You live the life you think about and change things at will.

    Bruno LoGreco said...

    Yes, I realized that that only thing that is stopping me from reaching my success indicators on my journey is me and myself.

    Clearly from my past experiences, my life has no room for Me, Myself and I - Therefore, I've chosen to remove, "Me" and "Myself" from the journey and live with "I" :)

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    Ten Powerful Self-Coaching Tips

    By Bruno LoGreco

    Are you living the life of creativity and happiness that you've always dreamed of, or are you allowing your fears or other outside factors to influence you?

    Following the path that your heart's desires requires courage and might require a shift in attitude. There are several methods you can use to act as your own life coach and start working toward the life you dream of.

    Ideas for self-improvement

    You don't need to change every aspect of your life at once in order to improve your attitude and outlook on life. Self-improvement can feel daunting if you try to change everything at once.

    A good way to embark on your journey of self-coaching is to make one change and see what kind of impact it has upon your life. The following tips are designed to help you improve your life and become your own life coach. Try out one of the following tips at a time to positively impact your attitude and daily life.

    1. Find some ‘you' time. Everyone needs time alone to meditate and recharge. You may think you don't have extra time in your day. Start with 10-20 minutes to use for meditation or silent reflection.

    2. Ask yourself what you truly want in life. Are you living your life according to your true dreams and desires? You may be unaware of your desires that lie hidden beneath your surface needs and wants, so take the time to find out.

    3. Write everything down. Even if your thought seems silly, write it down! You may be surprised by the inspiration and ideas you can come up with.

    4. Journal daily, but with a twist. Instead of just writing about today, try writing about yesterday.

    5. Keep track of the "happy moments." Each day has potential for many small moments that bring joy and happiness. If you don't make a special note of them, you may not even recognize the small joys in your day.

    6. Choose one task each night to complete the next day. This way, you have focus, and you accomplish at least one task. Tasking and taxing yourself with effort is important in reaching goals.

    7. Smile when you wake up. Smiling is contagious. By smiling you improve your mood and can potentially improve someone else's day as well.

    8. Give thanks each night. Gratitude will improve your outlook on life and help you see all the good and wonderful moments of your day.

    9. Try something new. A new experience fuels creativity and your enjoyment of the day.

    10. Create at least one memorable moment each day. Make each day unforgettable, even if in a small way!

    Taking the next step with a life coach

    Self-coaching tips are great ideas for helping you improve your life. However, you can take your life to the next level with a life coach and mentor. A professional life coach can help you set goals and help you move forward with your dreams. If you're looking for the right path toward happiness, a life coach can help you discover the path your heart truly desires.

    Want to learn more about self-improvement? Bruno LoGreco is a Life Coach Toronto and mentor. Visit BrunoLoGreco.com and find out how to unleash your potential for success and happiness.

    The Success Indicators on Your Life Path

    Many people seek out a particular goal in their life path and are content when they achieve it. The chance to broaden their horizons or learn new things within an existent structure is not as appealing to them as it is to some others. This is an issue that arises in many individuals because they mistakenly think they have achieved what they wanted to in their lives. The plethora of environmental noise around them begins to infringe upon their goals and forces them to lose sight of what they truly wanted.

    A good way to think of this problem is to envision a large square box. This is not just any box though. Rather, in this case, your box has been divided into three separate, but equally shaped rectangular boxes, all stacked on top of one another. Each of these rectangular boxes is a highly important expression of your life goals -- individual levels of success. Within each of these levels of success is an indicator that tells you how close you are to becoming successful in this area of your life.

    Every area of your life that you identify as a potential path for success can be further divided, containing the many different events and obstacles you will encounter as you strive to reach your goals. Think of each sector of your life as being divided even further, with three new sections within one of the three stacked boxes (sectors). Within each stacked box are three separate sections, divided by dotted lines that make up the life path you will follow. These dotted lines are not the same as the solid lines dividing the sectors -- they are a path that you have envisioned since childhood -- a series of goals and pathways to success that you want to follow.

    As young people, these life paths may not be fully formed. Or they might be crystal clear in our minds--long, straight life paths from the early days of college and adult living to the ultimate goal of success that you have always strived for. You can see exactly what you need to do to reach each success indicator and achieve what you have set out to accomplish. And you probably did just this. After all, your goals as a youth were to be successful in the same way that you saw thousands of others live their lives. You wanted to reach your success indicators and experience the measure of success by which you would measure you life for decades to come.

    However, nothing is ever as simple as we envision it during youth. There are countless factors that interfere with your ability to clearly see those success indicators and life paths to success. These factors, or "Environmental Noise," can be detrimental to even the most focused of individuals. Think of what would happen if you dumped the contents of downtown New York into your box and tried to maintain your focus on those goals. Would you even be able to see your life path anymore?

    Everyone must travel their life path with environmental noise inundating them from all sides. It begins to become cloudy. The dotted lines, our life paths, begin to look like the straight lines and the success indicators start to be confused with any number of different distractions.

    And then something will happen and you will realize that you are in fact nowhere near the original success indicators you set for yourself. Everything has changed and yet you are stuck in a way. You are deep within the center of the middle rectangular box and you have no idea which way to go or how to get back on track. The noise only grows louder and you grow dizzy trying to regain your focus.

    It is in this instant that you must clear the noise and return to the basic, almost instinctive mode of thought you experienced as a child. What did you want from life? Where did you want to go? What do you need to get to that point? What was my life path? All of these questions must be asked without the distractions of the world around you muddying up your thought process. When you can revert to a very simple perspective of the world and only spend time thinking of what you want from life, you can be that much more successful.

    You can succeed in life despite the environmental noise, cruising down your life paths and moving through your rectangles with ease, but oftentimes you need a helping hand to clear away the noise and look at life with fresh eyes. There is nothing wrong with asking for help to weed out these distractions and remove the clutter from your life sectors with a professional life coach.

    Is your life path inundated with environmental noise? Learn how you can lift the noise and begin reestablishing your success indicators today. Visit www.brunologreco.com a Life Coach Toronto today.

    Chapters.ca

    Top 10 Benefits to Journaling

    By Bruno Logreco

    There are countless reasons to maintaining a journal. The top ten benefits of journaling may differ from person to person. However, there seems to be general themes that are attractive in the collective unconscious. Many people are looking to daily entries of their personal experiences to reap some of the following rewards.

    Maintaining a journal is a natural way to exercise the brain. People who make regular entries are taking time to develop writing and communication skills that are very valuable in everyday interactions. This mental exercise also helps to allow your thoughts to flow freely.

    Creativity is a second benefit to consider. This is an important aspect of journaling. The right hemisphere of the brain is associated with visual, imaginative and intuitive facets of thought. When you take time to write, you free the right hemisphere. The ideal entry will be one that puts the inner editor on hold. Thoughts and ideas should flow freely and naturally.

    The uninhibited nature of this form of writing serves a third benefit of developing self awareness. People often create different faces to meet various circumstances. We tend to recreate in distinct situations including the work environment, the community and even when at home.

    The process of keeping a journal helps you recognize the various aspects of your unique personality. The growing self awareness is a powerful force that can lead to even greater benefits in the future. Gaining insight into the self is among the most important aspects to maintaining a journal.

    The fourth benefit is the ability to set priorities. Once you get a grasp on the thoughts and emotions that are filtered through your personal experience, you begin to gain control of them. The process eventually leads to a greater understanding of what is and what is not important.

    The ability to re-see the past is another great benefit of keeping a journal. The pages can be revisited with a fresh perspective. It can be very surprising how much your understanding of an event changes over a relatively short period of time. Some writers find great moments of epiphany when rethinking and rereading entries.

    Journaling is a fantastic problem-solving resource. The approach of using entries to come up with various solutions to troubles is a little different than approaches for self awareness and growth. Many people choose temporary brainstorming techniques that serve to give viable solutions to problems.

    The seventh benefit of journaling is variety. You can choose what kind of entries you want to make. Common choices include brainstorming sessions, automatic writing and reflective notes. Personal journal entries can be made upon inspiration, when you first wake or right before you fall asleep. Some choose to do a combination of these.

    Purging is the eighth benefit to this practice. Many people find it helpful to place negative thoughts and feelings down on paper. Once the negative energy is placed on the page, they are free to let it go. This practice also works well when dealing with anger towards another individual. Purge the negativity and work towards a constructive approach.

    The ability to communicate with others is another benefit of keeping a journal. Those who work with life coaches can find a wealth of resources for sessions. Journaling can help you tap into your fears and dreams, helping your coach gain insight through entries that you choose to share.

    The tenth benefit is improvement in your overall health. Journaling reduces stress. It provides time for you to meditate. The process helps to make the positive forces in your life surface and it helps to bring the harmful elements into light. The result of personal journaling is a new perspective on how you can take control of many aspects of your life.

    Want to learn how online journaling can help you reach goals and problem solve? Learn more about life coach Toronto at brunologreco.com and journaling at iijournal.

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