Tuesday, June 28, 2011
Friday, June 17, 2011
Need your help choosing the title for my upcoming book. Here's a brief:
Not long ago I was like many other people: stuck, bored, without passion. On paper, I had it all—a great job, a decent paycheck, personal freedom—but inside I was struggling. I devoured all the classic self-help books on business, psychology, marketing, and spiritual enlightenment, searching for answers, convinced that by crunching together all those magic numbers (four-hour-workweeks, one-minute management, seven habits of highly effective people), I could make it all add up and find some inner contentment. I did, but I didn’t learn it from reading. I learned it by observing, and then by doing. Now I want to share what I’ve learned with you.
Pick your choice here : https://www.facebook.com/life.coach.toronto
Wednesday, June 15, 2011
“When you lose touch with your inner stillness, you lose touch with yourself. When you lose touch with yourself, you lose touch with the world.” –Eckhart Tolle
Eckhart Tolle explains that stillness is in fact a form of awareness. When you apply this concept with having self-awareness there can be no denying the truth in his words. Self-awareness is having a clear perception of your personality; this includes your strengths and weaknesses, your thoughts, your beliefs, your motivations and your emotions. Being in-tuned with self-awareness affords you a better understanding of other people and how they perceive you, as well as your attitude and your responses to them in the moment. Self-awareness is one of the attributes of Emotional Intelligence and is an important factor in achieving success. Developing your self-awareness will enable you to improve upon your thoughts and interpretations and ultimately pave the road to a healthier, more successful and pro-active YOU!
When you afford yourself some quite time to be ‘Still’ in your thoughts and emotions, you will have a stronger and clearer connectivity in recognizing your personality and behavioural pattern. View this as a road map taking you on an inner personal journey of success. The more in tuned you are with your own ‘Self’ the more enhanced your interpretations and responses will be with other people. Ergo, the ability to empathize facilitates stronger personal and professional relationships.
The time you spend on personal reflection aids in facilitating the empowerment of understanding one’s true essence. This includes attaining a deeper knowledge in recognizing triggers that may set off positive or negative interpretations. Being mindful of your thoughts, your words, and your overall behaviour can increase the government of your overall well-being, thus, reaching a higher level of success on your life’s journey.
It is of great benefit for you to catch any negative behavioural patterns early on so as not to get lost in a disarming personal roller-coaster of negativity and/or self-doubt. Developing self-awareness helps to make the necessary changes in your mind and behaviour. With continued practice, you will instinctively begin to make better choices in your thought process before an emotional reaction or destructive behaviour takes charge.
Try and take a few moments each day to reflect on the day’s events. Be honest and truthful with yourself and accept any regrets of the day by learning the lesson(s) of what may have caused your, perhaps negative reaction/response. Embrace your weaknesses and commend your strengths. Believe in yourself and in your ability to improve and connect deeper towards your true essence of your ‘Self’.
Being self-aware affords you a deeper connection within yourself and with the world!
Bruno LoGreco life coach toronto, author & speaker
Tuesday, June 7, 2011
Here it is plain and simple:
Emotional Intelligence is the ability to consciously align your behaviors to a desired outcome.
It may sound simple, but that doesn’t mean it’s easy. That’s because behaviors are influenced by emotions, and emotions are influenced by a variety of things like personal needs, values, past experience, and instinct. The raw input of our environment passes through these filters, and our brain delivers a verdict in the form of an interpretation. And that, in turn, produces a behavior.
Basically, it’s “Channel and Choose.” Your brain receives stimulus, channels it through your own personal filters, and then chooses an action.
One of the wondrous and amazing things about the human brain is that it can operate at a meta level of consciousness, above these routine brain processes. We can become aware of our own filters, needs and values that trigger particular emotions. We can process those emotions and then evaluate potential responses. We can learn to recognize situations that create an “emotional-hijack” and produce ineffective (or even destructive) behaviors—and change that course.
Some think that “Emotional Intelligence” is all touchy-feely and requires you to act a certain way all the time. Nothing could be father from the truth. Emotional Intelligence is about being able to choose your behaviors, rather than having the behaviors choose you. It’s about recognizing patterns in yourself and others so that you can be in control of your actions.
Understanding oneself is the first level of Emotional Intelligence. With that insight, we can then move into understanding what drives other people’s behaviors. This is where the concept becomes extremely powerful.
How Does It Work?
Let’s say you’re trying to enlist colleagues to support a proposal. You know it’s a great idea, and you explain it in detail, and yet one of your associates blows up defensively and stalks out of the room. What happened? Well, that person’s brain filtered a strong negative emotion. Was it something you said? Was it how you said it? Could you have anticipated this reaction and changed your approach? This is where Emotional Intelligence gives us a rich toolkit.
People are all different, and yet there are predicable behavioral patterns that form personality styles. You may be familiar with some of these frameworks such as Myers-Briggs, Social Styles, or DiSC. These frameworks provide a structured way to understand behavioral tendencies, and develop an understanding of how your behavior affects others. These skills increase your effectiveness by improving your relationships with others. You can learn to tailor and adapt your communication style so that it meshes well with different styles, to produce a positive result. In avoiding other people’s emotional triggers and hijacks, the path remains open for collaboration.
How Do You Get Some?
Studies show that Emotional Intelligence is more important than IQ in determining the future success of a person. The good news about Emotional Intelligence is that it can be learned and refined over time.
1. Gain Insight to Yourself. There are many ways to do this. You can complete a standard assessment such as the DiSC Inventory or the Social Styles index. These assessments are available through a variety of sources online and deliver a detailed report of your overall tendencies.
Another means of insight is to ask people you trust. This requires courage and a thick skin, and your genuine desire to take in whatever they have to say, even if you disagree. Hearing something that seems totally inconsistent with your self-perception can be very painful, but it’s also the best way to see gaps between your intentions and your behaviors.
2. Learn About Emotional Intelligence and Personality Styles. Two of the principal works on Emotional Intelligence are Emotional Intelligence by Dr. Daniel Goleman, and Emotional Intelligence 2.0 by Drs. Travis Bradbury and Jeanne Greaves. Books like People Styles at Work (Robert Bolton & Dorothy Grover Bolton) break down how each personality style filters information, communicates, and interacts with the other styles. There are numerous books and classes available on the DiSC framework, as well.
3. Work on One or Two Behaviors At a Time. Rather than trying to take on the whole world of personality differences, choose one or two areas that seem to cause you the most trouble. Maybe it’s having people listen to you? Perhaps it’s your short temper? Observe the situations where this happens, note the external stimulus or triggers, and think about how your brain may be unconsciously delivering a filtered response that is counter-productive. You’ll be amazed at how much calmer you can remain when you are aware of your own “hot buttons.”
4. Get a Coach or a Mentor. If you want a truly objective viewpoint, a coach or mentor can be invaluable. They will help you to recognize patterns in yourself and others, and build your ability to consciously choose your behaviors rather than being driven by pure emotion.
Once you understand how your emotions influence your behaviors, and the behaviors of others, you will look at interactions as opportunities to build rapport and enhance communication. The benefits are immense to decision-making, relationships, and even to your overall health. According to Warren Bennis, author of On Becoming a Leader, “Emotional Intelligence is much more powerful than IQ in determining who emerges as a leader. IQ is a threshold competence. You need it, but it doesn’t make you a star. Emotional Intelligence can.”
And who doesn’t want to be a star?
Get started on cultivating emotional intelligence this week with Pam Stanton and myself on #AskTheCoach Thursday 4pm
Bruno LoGreco Life Coach, Toronto Mentor, Author & Speaker
Wednesday, June 1, 2011
My name is Sandra Smilovits and I have spent more than half my life struggling with indomitable self-confidence issues. I come from a good family, full of wonderful childhood experiences and opportunities at my finger-tips; yet the jaws of fear, ever so ominously looming in the wayside, always gave way to my resistance in anything and everything I inevitably was ‘encouraged’ to do. I couldn’t escape the feeling that I was not worthy, not smart enough, savvy or pretty enough. I always felt as though people were judging me and I never fit the bill.
Self-esteem is how you feel about yourself as a person, your overall judgement of yourself. It boils down to the fact that you have self-respect, you also have self-love, as well as having self-worth. You value yourself! And why not, there is nobody else in this world like you. You are authentic and skilled and beautiful. The time had come for me to break down the barriers and truly live life as my Authentic Self. To stand tall and proud to follow my hearts dream and build on my own talents; to reclaim my self-confidence. I began to set small goals for myself and in achieving each goal I felt my self-esteem begin to flourish. Most importantly, I began to share my love for writing with the world!
Choosing to let go of all my failures and deceptions of my past, I was able to connect with my true inner being with the guided help of an extraordinarily talented life coach: Bruno LoGreco. With his guidance, I broke free of self-made obstacles and relinquished the chains of fear that used to consume my essence. Bruno’s gentle heart carefully navigated me through the forest of all my fears and ambiguities I had lead throughout my life, thus far. His careful tutelage and intuitiveness touched me, letting me know that I was indeed, not alone. Working openly and honestly with Bruno proved to be monumental for re-introducing my inner child to myself.
We all struggle with feelings of inadequacy from time to time. Bruno has taught me to be true to myself. In concentrating on the contributions you make to the betterment of the world, you will find that you will no longer have the inclination or the desire to fuss over your own inadequacies. This will surely increase your self-confidence and concede optimum efficiency in all your contributions. The more you contribute to the world the more you will be rewarded with personal success and recognition. Bruno has not only taught me this through his words but also through his actions. He is a guru in loving life to the fullest which starts with loving yourself first and foremost. From the bottom of my heart, I thank you Bruno. To any and all of you who may have resonated with anything at all I have written, I encourage you to take that leap of faith and re-connect with yourself. Believe in you!!!
To help you get your confidence under way Eva Lahman from Exel Bicosmetica is giving away Skincare products Thursday 4pm at #AskTheCoach
Ten Powerful Self-Coaching Tips
Are you living the life of creativity and happiness that you've always dreamed of, or are you allowing your fears or other outside factors to influence you?
Following the path that your heart's desires requires courage and might require a shift in attitude. There are several methods you can use to act as your own life coach and start working toward the life you dream of.
Ideas for self-improvement
You don't need to change every aspect of your life at once in order to improve your attitude and outlook on life. Self-improvement can feel daunting if you try to change everything at once.
A good way to embark on your journey of self-coaching is to make one change and see what kind of impact it has upon your life. The following tips are designed to help you improve your life and become your own life coach. Try out one of the following tips at a time to positively impact your attitude and daily life.
1. Find some ‘you' time. Everyone needs time alone to meditate and recharge. You may think you don't have extra time in your day. Start with 10-20 minutes to use for meditation or silent reflection.
2. Ask yourself what you truly want in life. Are you living your life according to your true dreams and desires? You may be unaware of your desires that lie hidden beneath your surface needs and wants, so take the time to find out.
3. Write everything down. Even if your thought seems silly, write it down! You may be surprised by the inspiration and ideas you can come up with.
4. Journal daily, but with a twist. Instead of just writing about today, try writing about yesterday.
5. Keep track of the "happy moments." Each day has potential for many small moments that bring joy and happiness. If you don't make a special note of them, you may not even recognize the small joys in your day.
6. Choose one task each night to complete the next day. This way, you have focus, and you accomplish at least one task. Tasking and taxing yourself with effort is important in reaching goals.
7. Smile when you wake up. Smiling is contagious. By smiling you improve your mood and can potentially improve someone else's day as well.
8. Give thanks each night. Gratitude will improve your outlook on life and help you see all the good and wonderful moments of your day.
9. Try something new. A new experience fuels creativity and your enjoyment of the day.
10. Create at least one memorable moment each day. Make each day unforgettable, even if in a small way!
Taking the next step with a life coach
Self-coaching tips are great ideas for helping you improve your life. However, you can take your life to the next level with a life coach and mentor. A professional life coach can help you set goals and help you move forward with your dreams. If you're looking for the right path toward happiness, a life coach can help you discover the path your heart truly desires.
Want to learn more about self-improvement? Bruno LoGreco is a Life Coach Toronto and mentor. Visit BrunoLoGreco.com and find out how to unleash your potential for success and happiness.
The Success Indicators on Your Life Path
A good way to think of this problem is to envision a large square box. This is not just any box though. Rather, in this case, your box has been divided into three separate, but equally shaped rectangular boxes, all stacked on top of one another. Each of these rectangular boxes is a highly important expression of your life goals -- individual levels of success. Within each of these levels of success is an indicator that tells you how close you are to becoming successful in this area of your life.
Every area of your life that you identify as a potential path for success can be further divided, containing the many different events and obstacles you will encounter as you strive to reach your goals. Think of each sector of your life as being divided even further, with three new sections within one of the three stacked boxes (sectors). Within each stacked box are three separate sections, divided by dotted lines that make up the life path you will follow. These dotted lines are not the same as the solid lines dividing the sectors -- they are a path that you have envisioned since childhood -- a series of goals and pathways to success that you want to follow.
As young people, these life paths may not be fully formed. Or they might be crystal clear in our minds--long, straight life paths from the early days of college and adult living to the ultimate goal of success that you have always strived for. You can see exactly what you need to do to reach each success indicator and achieve what you have set out to accomplish. And you probably did just this. After all, your goals as a youth were to be successful in the same way that you saw thousands of others live their lives. You wanted to reach your success indicators and experience the measure of success by which you would measure you life for decades to come.
However, nothing is ever as simple as we envision it during youth. There are countless factors that interfere with your ability to clearly see those success indicators and life paths to success. These factors, or "Environmental Noise," can be detrimental to even the most focused of individuals. Think of what would happen if you dumped the contents of downtown New York into your box and tried to maintain your focus on those goals. Would you even be able to see your life path anymore?
Everyone must travel their life path with environmental noise inundating them from all sides. It begins to become cloudy. The dotted lines, our life paths, begin to look like the straight lines and the success indicators start to be confused with any number of different distractions.
And then something will happen and you will realize that you are in fact nowhere near the original success indicators you set for yourself. Everything has changed and yet you are stuck in a way. You are deep within the center of the middle rectangular box and you have no idea which way to go or how to get back on track. The noise only grows louder and you grow dizzy trying to regain your focus.
It is in this instant that you must clear the noise and return to the basic, almost instinctive mode of thought you experienced as a child. What did you want from life? Where did you want to go? What do you need to get to that point? What was my life path? All of these questions must be asked without the distractions of the world around you muddying up your thought process. When you can revert to a very simple perspective of the world and only spend time thinking of what you want from life, you can be that much more successful.
You can succeed in life despite the environmental noise, cruising down your life paths and moving through your rectangles with ease, but oftentimes you need a helping hand to clear away the noise and look at life with fresh eyes. There is nothing wrong with asking for help to weed out these distractions and remove the clutter from your life sectors with a professional life coach.
Is your life path inundated with environmental noise? Learn how you can lift the noise and begin reestablishing your success indicators today. Visit www.brunologreco.com a Life Coach Toronto today.
Top 10 Benefits to Journaling
There are countless reasons to maintaining a journal. The top ten benefits of journaling may differ from person to person. However, there seems to be general themes that are attractive in the collective unconscious. Many people are looking to daily entries of their personal experiences to reap some of the following rewards.
Maintaining a journal is a natural way to exercise the brain. People who make regular entries are taking time to develop writing and communication skills that are very valuable in everyday interactions. This mental exercise also helps to allow your thoughts to flow freely.
Creativity is a second benefit to consider. This is an important aspect of journaling. The right hemisphere of the brain is associated with visual, imaginative and intuitive facets of thought. When you take time to write, you free the right hemisphere. The ideal entry will be one that puts the inner editor on hold. Thoughts and ideas should flow freely and naturally.
The uninhibited nature of this form of writing serves a third benefit of developing self awareness. People often create different faces to meet various circumstances. We tend to recreate in distinct situations including the work environment, the community and even when at home.
The process of keeping a journal helps you recognize the various aspects of your unique personality. The growing self awareness is a powerful force that can lead to even greater benefits in the future. Gaining insight into the self is among the most important aspects to maintaining a journal.
The fourth benefit is the ability to set priorities. Once you get a grasp on the thoughts and emotions that are filtered through your personal experience, you begin to gain control of them. The process eventually leads to a greater understanding of what is and what is not important.
The ability to re-see the past is another great benefit of keeping a journal. The pages can be revisited with a fresh perspective. It can be very surprising how much your understanding of an event changes over a relatively short period of time. Some writers find great moments of epiphany when rethinking and rereading entries.
Journaling is a fantastic problem-solving resource. The approach of using entries to come up with various solutions to troubles is a little different than approaches for self awareness and growth. Many people choose temporary brainstorming techniques that serve to give viable solutions to problems.
The seventh benefit of journaling is variety. You can choose what kind of entries you want to make. Common choices include brainstorming sessions, automatic writing and reflective notes. Personal journal entries can be made upon inspiration, when you first wake or right before you fall asleep. Some choose to do a combination of these.
Purging is the eighth benefit to this practice. Many people find it helpful to place negative thoughts and feelings down on paper. Once the negative energy is placed on the page, they are free to let it go. This practice also works well when dealing with anger towards another individual. Purge the negativity and work towards a constructive approach.
The ability to communicate with others is another benefit of keeping a journal. Those who work with life coaches can find a wealth of resources for sessions. Journaling can help you tap into your fears and dreams, helping your coach gain insight through entries that you choose to share.
The tenth benefit is improvement in your overall health. Journaling reduces stress. It provides time for you to meditate. The process helps to make the positive forces in your life surface and it helps to bring the harmful elements into light. The result of personal journaling is a new perspective on how you can take control of many aspects of your life.